It's the time of the year when you (or I to be frank) have to worry about results. It's not all about grades in the University, I know. But what is it then without grades? Haha. Well, other than that, there's 25 days of SUKSIS training once again. Come on, they owed us our allowances and not in a small sum that is. Still, why so many days of training? I mean it's the semester break and aren't we supposed to be sitting at our home enjoying quality time. Damn. However, one is usually helpless in such situations because we took an oath to become a KS (unless ingnorant is bliss which is yet another case). I do not regret involving myself into such activites but I just hope that I can spend more time out of the campus, with my family especially. But as one grows up, it starts to seem harder. If I pursue my dreams, maybe I'd be stationed somewhere far away from home. How am I going to cope with that? It's going to be hard and for a person like me, I'd prefer not to think of that at the mean time. Anyway, I hope that my prayers would be heard and there's peace everywhere on earth.
I used to have a love-hate relationship with festive seasons, more so when it comes to Christmas, and New Year too since it is celebrated only a few days after the former and both are closely associated. At 12 a.m. sharp I would compose my own text messages, hoping that recipients who consist of those that I care about the most would feel the sincerity, albeit in its electronic form. Yet lately I seem to have lost that enthusiasm, that fire which kindles my heart to share the spirit of whatever festivity, and I say so solemnly. I sometimes find myself lamenting the fact that what used to mean a lot to one would eventually lost its meaning somehow, though in some remote cases there are exceptions. Mostly what's left are broken memories, remnants of our former selves which we are unable to let go, and believe me they will forever be there, haunting us wherever we go. My mouth remains shut, though my eyes see, and it's excruciatingly difficult to play dumb; there will always be wo...
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